Rich and I have been talking a lot about what a special trust it is to be parents. The future of our children is largely dictated by the experiences they have under our care and the examples we set for them. It can be intimidating to think that I have that much influence over someone whom I love so much. It is indeed humbling.
A lot of motherhood requires the self control and self awareness to realize when a situation vs a person is bothering you, and the awareness that your perspective isn't the only one to take into account. Personally, I've come to the conclusion that "mommy time-outs" are the best!
Sometimes I get so caught up in my own frustrations, that I need to take a break (even 30 seconds) away from whatever is bothering me and just breathe. It has saved me countless times from being a bad mommy, or an off the hinge nut-case.
William has been extremely clingy lately. I've resigned to the fact that I am a human jungle gym for the next while, until he enters a new stage.
Yesterday was my breaking day. We are in the middle of a move, I was extra exhausted, and we started the day off whiney and clingy. I had no juice in my box; no gas in my tank. Yet my baby required premium and 100%, no sugar added. Perfect combination.
As I battled my fatigue and irritation, I prayed to be able to meet William's needs. I prayed to be a good mommy and to be blessed with inspiration to know how to help my baby.
My prayer gave me the strength to get through the day; although it didn't turn it into sunshine and roses. I busted out my trusty baby book and sought answers to returning my happy baby and personal sanity. I found a few helpful tips, took several mommy time-outs, and with the help of my hubby we ended the day with all of us exhausted and needy.
Today I wanted to be different. I decided to focus more on Will's curiosity, so I described everything I was doing in our morning routine. I preempted Will's whining that always begins when I get myself breakfast, and placed him in his high chair with a yummy cracker. I ate in peace!! I cleaned him up, talked to him, and then set him down with NO crying (hooray!!)
This was a simple morning, but it filled me with joy and relief. It felt like a merciful answer to my prayers. I know Will's whininess will come and go, but today I just needed a win. I needed a successful morning to kick off my day. I'm so grateful I was blessed with it. It made sneaking in and finding my bear all snug and conked out that much more fulfilling and heart warming.
I love being a mommy, hard times and all.
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